Writing Anxiety

It’s day whatever of NaNoWriMo.

I decided to do some descriptive writing, and construct the places where my characters will live and work. My first idea for a location is a place like Heaven, a Perfect Place. One of my characters dies and goes there. I think she’ll be flitting between her world and ours. It’s the start of an actual plot!

So I went over to the table by the window, set up my iPad, and connected the keyboard. Butterflies started fluttering around in my stomach. I wasn’t sure I knew what to write, or even if wanted to write.

I listened to some old episodes of the Writing Excuses podcast last night and got inspired. They were talking about getting published and it made me realize that publishing a novel is not really a dream of mine. I really could take it or leave it. That sounds healthy eh? But, if I’m writing simply for writing’s sake, why am I so nervous? Why do I keep checking the word counter to see how I’m doing?

Clearly, it’s fear. Isn’t it? If it is, what am I afraid of? Hopefully, if I keep writing, I’ll find the answers?

I listen to, and love the Wrestling with Depression podcast. I think I’d like to be interviewed by Marty DeRosa. When he talks to people so much comes out. I think I could learn a lot about myself by having a conversation with Marty. Alas, I don’t think I’m interesting enough to be on his show. Maybe if I go into stand-up comedy in Chicago someday…

It snowed this morning! It was in the upper 60s yesterday and today it snows. I’ve really got to move to San Diego. Why do I live in Indiana? That’s a story I’ve probably already related in this blog, or in one of its previous incarnations so I won’t go any further. In fact, I think that this post has run its course.

2 thoughts on “Writing Anxiety

  1. You got a reader if you ever develop your plot. You go girl – focus. We need more perfect places, and I’d love to see your idea of it. I believe if you actually think it through, you’ll create one in some possible world some possible place right under our noses in an extra dimension that we can sometime sense with some organs we do not know we have, or know them well but no idea that they can do that. Writing is super hard, so just let it pour out.

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