The weekend was good. I was pretty much anxiety free. Today the anxiety is there but it’s not as severe. I’m sitting downstairs at the YMCA. I decided to sit and write while resting from my workout. I did 20 minutes on the treadmill, some upper body strength training, and then another 20 on the treadmill. I’m listening to ‘Sinnerman’ by Nina Simone on Spotify.
Every moment feels like frustration because the same record plays constantly in my mind. I’m not accomplishing what I should be accomplishing and it always seems to go back to the clutter in my house. Then it goes back to me feeling lazy because I don’t seem capable of doing anything about the clutter. I’d love to throw everything away and start fresh. My physical clutter mirrors my mental clutter.There’s a book called ‘The Life Chaning Magic of Tidying Up.‘ I’m actually afraid to read the book. Do I think it will make me confront parts of myself that I don’t want to see? I Need to read the book don’t I? I really do want to change my life!
John Legend’s ‘Stay with You’ is on Spotify now. It’s rather beautiful.
I think I’ll wrap this up and head to the car. It’s time to get on with things. Maybe I can get rid of some stuff today.
I made this last night with iPhone apps. I would like to incorporate it into a canvas someday. Maybe I will.